(me & my best friend, Delan of 13 years!)
So, it’s heavy on me to clear up this whole friend thing. I did a blog on best friends, but I want to just get really raw & uncut in this area. I think we’ve been bamboozled.
WHO told you that LIFE was all about you?! We go through friends like we’re drinking water– while running from the first one who offends us. YES, I believe that everyone cannot rock with you. YES I believe that GOD sets you apart but I ALSO believe that YOU throw away friendships that ARE good because of your skewed vision. If I cut off every person that hurt me, I would NOT have a single friend! My two best friends of 13 years each & I have gone through SOME stuff together. We’ve argued, had quiet seasons, didn’t talk, talked, yelled, screamed, fought, you NAME it. But we’ve stuck it out over the years and the relationship got better. A friendship is like a marriage. YOU WORK THROUGH IT. They are both covenant relationships. I cannot expect my friends to be “PERFECT” & neither can you.
The KEY to a healthy friendship is “acceptance.” It may be hard for you to accept your friends in their current state but you ain’t God & you cannot be GOD over their life. YOU cannot change them. IF they wanna sleep around & act a fool, you get on your face for them & pray for them! As I said above, there’s some amazing relationships that GOD placed you in and at the FIRST sign of trouble– you RUN. Then you call it a closed door by God.. but GOD didn’t really close that door, YOU & your emotions did. Are you serious?! There’s times where my friends were disobeying God and I knew it! I didn’t throw them away because you know what– I aint perfect either. I have ISSUES & things I NEED to work on. What if God threw us away everytime we “missed it”– we wouldn’t have made it past 2 years old.
The next time you are tempted to be “mad” at someone– slow down, check your emotions & SEE where you’re involved in the equation. Our past hurts, pains & struggles PLAY a part in how we respond to people. Sometimes, we’re overly sensitive, touchy, easily angered & guarded because of everyone else before them. So, instead of throwing the next person away that “irritates” you– check yourself first. No friendship is perfect & every relationship has growing pains. Remember that it cannot possibly be “everyone” else and if it is them.. give them some of the grace that God gives you daily. ♥
So today, I challenge you. Do you say “all girls the same?!” Do you NOT want to hang out with anyone or open up to anyone because you think everyone is going to hurt you? It cannot possibly be all of those people you meet. You HAVE a part to play somewhere in there and it’s time to take responsibility of pushing everyone away. Then, go to Christ & let HIM heal your HEART. Stop holding on to every baggage from your past. Vent, cry, get it all out & then BE a good friend to those around you. GRACE people. LOVE them with the love that Christ has given you. Treat people how you want to be treated. STOP gossiping about your friends as if you don’t have a backyard. You are hurt when others talk about you– so why would you talk about others?
Let’s DO our part.
GOD loves you like crazy,
Heather
